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Love Types: How Personality Influences Attraction 

Love Types: How Personality Influences Attraction 

According to Dr. Alexander Avila, our personality type determines the people to whom we are mot attracted. It also determines which people will be most attracted to us. Essentially, when two people’s personalities are well matched, they are more likely to experience passion for one another, enjoy each other’s company, and work well at creating a life together. In his book, “Love types: Discover Your Romantic Style and Find Your Soul Mate (Avon Books,1991),” Dr. Avila explains how the 16 personality types from the Myers-Briggs personality profile impact our love lives.  

There are four main dimensions of personality: 1) Energizing, 2) Focusing, 3) Deciding, and 4) Organizing. Each of these dimensions is divided into two opposite styles. Each person tends to operate predominantly in one of these two styles more than the other style. The unique combination of your styles on each of these 4 dimensions is your personality type. For instance, someone who is predominately introverted, intuitive, feeling and perceiving would be type INFP. The theory is that of the 16 possible personality types, certain types pair well with other types and have a greater chance of being happy together in a long-term committed relationship. So which personality type are you? And which personality types are most likely to be a successful match with you?   

There really is a science to why we are attracted to certain people. Dr. Avila believes that the more we understand about our own personality and the personalities to which we are most likely to be attracted, the more we can put ourselves in situations that will increase the odds of us meeting our match. (For instance, if you are trying to meet an Idealistic Philosopher (INFP), Dr. Avila recommends attending “activities that involve a crusade or mission,” bookstores, museums, the theater, or “working behind the scenes for political and charitable causes”).  

For more information about these personality types and the dynamics created by certain personality matches, I recommend you read “Love Types” by Alexander Avila. Who knows…it just might help you find your perfect match! 

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